Did ya know…?
Aphelandra dodsonii is a species of plant in the Acanthaceae family and is endemic to Ecuador. Its natural habitat is subtropical or tropical forests. It is threatened by habitat loss and when threatened, Aphelandra dodsonii goes doo-doo crazy on a sucka. This one time, at band camp, an unassuming cellist named Alberdi Humberto eroded just a smidge of Aphelandra dodsonii’s topsoil and Aphelandra dodsonii was all like, “Five Point Palm Exploding Heart, you erosive sumbeyatch!” and poor little Alberdi’s heart exploded into a billion tiny cardiac crumbs. The eroded topsoil would never be recovered, though local legend has it that if one walks up a flight of stairs backwards while holding a candle and a hand mirror, in a darkened house, one may catch an ectoplasmic reflection of the missing dirt.
Aphelandra dodsonii is a Gemini, enjoys the outdoors, homebrewing beer, and understands DNA replication.
…So know ya know!
Enlightenment and Freedom from Suffering | Hardcore Zen.
To me, meditation — zazen specifically — is a way to decrease some of the distractions of the mind. We don’t realize, generally, how incredibly distracted we are by the processes going on in our own brains. But if you work on dealing with some of them you discover that there was a whole world out there you had not noticed before because you were too distracted to perceive it. Do this for long enough and a shift in perception/understanding occurs.
The man stands
in front of his bathroom window,
holding the world’s most frizzled toothbrush;
toothbrush with bristles
like an electrocuted tribble.
one grey eye
on the house
across the street
and that one window
with a light
that never goes out,
that never casts
across drawn, pale,
his other grey eye
on his toothbrush’s gnarled reflection,
like a fiber-optic tree
with every car
that drives by.
The bristles shift
from ripe banana
to blank paper
to open wound
to healing scar.
across the street,
on the door,
about that never-darkened room.
that grizzled toothbrush;
to a plaque-annihilating model.
his bathroom light
brushes his teeth
bathed in headlights
of passing cars.
into a dark hole,
across the street,
To Pimp a Butterfly by Kendrick Lamar
What else would I pick for this week? C’mon now.
The yam is the power that be
You can smell it when I’m walking down the street
I can dig rapping, but a rapper with a ghost writer?
What the fuck happened? I swore I wouldn’t tell
But most of y’all share bars, like you got the bottom bunk in a two man cell
Something’s in the water
And if I got a brown nose for some gold then I’d rather be a bum than a motherfuckin’ baller
3 Saturdays, April 11, 18, & 25 – 2015 | 2 p.m. – 4 p.m.
Teaching Artists: Craig M. Workman & Jason Preu
With the explosion in popularity of dystopian work in every facet of pop culture, its force in our body of consumed work is undeniable. What is at the core of these examples of a “bad place”? How can they be crafted and published?
Register here: http://www.writersplace.org/workshops
Did ya know…?
Elephants (the “h” is silent) are large pants worn to lift their wearer up to hard-to-reach spaces. Invented by Archimedes Jones in 1944, elephants are pant made from a collapsible and nearly infinitely stretchable polymer blend wool and taffy known as waffy. Early on, elephants were worn to efficiently move people or goods between floors (levels, decks) of buildings, vessels, or other structures. Elephants have since replaced ladders as the preferred method of elevating oneself. Worn by window cleaners, utility repair workers, fire rescue personnel, and bored teenagers, elephants truly are a miracle of the modern age.
In the mid-90s, with the rise of extreme sports, the game of X-chicken began to gain a foothold. In X-chicken, teams of two face off, one team member wearing elephants (the “base”) and the other team member sitting on the base’s shoulders with an over-sized pugil stick (the “wacker”). The bases then engage their elephants to a pre-determined level (anywhere from 3 to 300 stories) and each team attempts to topple the other. Today, over 90 countries have competition X-chicken teams.
Archimedes’ granddaughter, Socriti Evans (married to billionaire stapler magnate, Leaven Evans), carries on the family tradition of producing and distributing elephants from Archimedes’ original factory in Alameda, CA.
…So now ya know!
treading the dull razor line
that’s hastily drawn
whenever we mention death
still young enough to feel
faint echoes of that communal hollow
from whence you sprung not so long ago
kicking, screaming, wondering in fever-pitched frustration
why this now?
i only listen;
answer with tender brutality
yes, it will happen to me
to your mother
to your sister
yes, other people will live
in our house
after we are gone
yes, even batman will die
i know, but even batman will die
for tonight, you don’t believe me
and that’s ok
Last Friday night, jennis5309 over at https://eternityinabox.wordpress.com/ kindly recited my poem “Weight Watchers” at the South Bay Writers Open Mic Reading.
Should you fancy a listen, she recorded her experiment: https://soundcloud.com/jennis5309/weight-watchers
Enjoy and thanks, jennis5309!
Avoid more meetings
Drink more coffee
Eat more butter
BeSkittle my shoes
Convince more people that they are, indeed, already god
Start a cult
Incite a riot
Laugh so hard I pee my pants
Laugh so hard I pee your pants
Pour more of my heart into more of these words
Continue experiments in making real Wuzzles
Eat local humans
Become a wizard
Touch the sun
Touch the moon